Federal What?

If I just heard Barack Obama correctly in his infomercial, he said he was going to hire an army of teachers and raise current teacher's salaries. Hmmmm, I thought teachers were paid locally? I guess there are federal teachers. Then he talked about the money being spent in Iraq every month and asked a frenzied crowd if they knew how many schools and hospitals could be built here in the United States with that money. That is the most ludicrous thing I've ever heard. He's making it out like if the money wasn't being spent on the war, we'd be building hospitals with it. Excuse me? Again, does the federal government build hospitals in communities? If they do, I'm sorry I didn't know that. If they build schools, I'll say I'm sorry. If Obama saves the money in Iraq, he's going to spend it somewhere else, trust me. Maybe it will be spent on things you personally agree with and that's fine for you. I think it will be wasted, and that's my opinion, We'll see new social programs sprouting up like weeds in my garden. Say whatever you want to say, but please don't act like that money will be spent on things that it won't.

Wind, Solar and BioFuel
I am so sick of hearing this line. Obama is talking about it in his infomercial. McCain says it as well, as has every person that has run for the Presidency since I can remember. We need to get off foreign oil and get on wind, solar and bio. When is it going to happen? It's like Jerry Lewis curing Muscular Dystrophy. Talk about it for 40 years and accomplish nothing.

Tonight 3 shows for your Friday Night week #5 pleasure! Snackers in Blue Springs is having a Halloween Party with Xtreme Team Trivia! Tanner's in Shawnee and Our 1st Friday Night show at Old Chicago in Overland Park with DJ Gribble!

Harvey Wallbangers is Xtreme!

Starting This Sunday Night Harvey Wallbangers in Lee's Summit will begin Xtreme Team Trivia! Show time is 8pm for Week #6 action of our city wide competition! The team with the most points over the next four weeks will head to Xtreme Team Trivia Championship #8!

301 SE Douglas
Lee's Summit, MO 64063
816-524-0001

Come Out Sunday for the best Sunday Night Show in Jackson County!

Courageous.....Is That the way to go?

I just got home from the donut shop and reading the Monday paper. One thing I noticed when reading the obituaries is that a lot of people die after a "courageous battle with cancer." Nobody ever seems to die after a cowardly battle with cancer.I hope I don't ever get cancer again because next time I'd completely wuss out and wreck humanity's unbroken streak of stalwart cancer patients. I'd be like, "Oh crap, is that cancer? Tell it I'm not home." Then I'd hide under the bed until it was gone. But eventually, after a long and spineless battle, I would succumb to cancer, and my friends would write an obituary that read, "The Big Dog died from cancer, the big pussy."On the other hand, maybe there's a reason that all of the obituaries are about courageous cancer patients. Maybe only the courageous cancer patients die. So then the trick to surviving cancer would be to wuss out early on. There should be a special section of the paper devoted to people who wussed out in the face of cancer but didn't die: "Joe Smith found out he had cancer and cried like a little girl for three weeks. His family is happy to report that his cancer is now in remission, but they are also a little embarrassed about what a baby he was about the whole thing."

Tonight @ Old Chicago in Olathe DJ Nick host week #5 action as Brown Chicken Brown Cow the #2 ranked team in the city looks to continue their winning ways! The Quigs will try to hang on to their point total lead at Paddy O'Quigley's in Leawood with DJ Charlie Agrusa.

you can also catch Trivia tonight at Tanner's in Waldo and Side Pockets in NKC!

Platte City is finally Xtreme!

Finally Xtreme Team Trivia has made it's way to Platte City! Beginning Monday Night November 3rd Xtreme Team Trivia will be at the Tanner's in Platte City! Show time will be 7:30 p.m to 10:30. Do you have friends that live in or around the Platte City area? tell them that Xtreme Team Trivia starts November 3rd! The team that scores the most points during the final 4 weeks of our competition will move onto the Voodoo lounge at Harrah's Casino to play or $1000

Wow....$1 Bud Light draws, Vodka Red Bulls and Grape Bombs OH MY!!! HANGOVER!

Has anyone ever come up with ways to describe how their hangover feels? well while i have been trying very hard not to move.....because if I do move i have to throw up.....I came up with some ways to describe this paticular hangover.

* for starters the pic of wrestler George the Animal steele gives a very good description!

* My hangover is more powerful than Castle Greyskull and Smurf village combined!

* I feel like their are five tiny midgets wrestling behind my eyeballs

* My head feels like it is full of scotch and anger!

* My hangover feels like it went back in time, kicked Charles Bronson's ass and took over for him in the movie Death Strike....it is a bad ass hangover......this is where your sympathy should kick in and bring me a bowl of Chicken soup...and orange juice and if someone could feed me some saltine crackers that would be awesome! Earlier I was laying in bed and someone rang the doorbell.....dog barked.....I did not risk moving to answer it.....do you ever wonder if when you do that it might be those million dollar prize people and you just missed your oppurtunity of a lifetime?

Now I am not drinking again for two years. (or tonight, whichever comes first). I have pain all over my body and my eyes are bloodshot. It isn't going away for some reason. It is probably unrelated to the drinking. I bet I have eye cancer.

Anyway Show time tonight at Tanner's in Shawnee is 8:30 hosted by the I am never drinking again DJ Me! you can also catch DJ Charlie Agrusa tonight at Snackers in Blue Springs!

How do you get killed by a tiger from San Francisco?

So Last night on the news they were talking about the lawsuit by the family for the guy that was killed by the Tiger at the San Francisco zoo. poor guy. Can you imagine walking down a scenic pathway and then being attacked by a tiger? Named "Tatiana"? I'm guessing this tiger grew up in the hood with a name like that. Why isn't a tiger ever named "Steve"? Since it was in San Fran, I'm surprised it killed somebody. I can see a tiger from the DC zoo or the Detroit zoo killing someone, but you'd think maybe the tiger from San Fran would just jump out and give somebody a makeover or something. Maybe give them a quick mani-pedi? Oh well, this is sad and I hate to make light of it, but geez....we're not safe in a mall, school, Disney World, church....the zoo. Not sure what's left. I'm sure the victim's family doesn't want to hear this but at least it wasn't a child that died. Can you imagine if the thing jumped into a group of toddlers? That would be like me eating popcorn at the movies.

Last night at Tanner's in Shawnee we had an unbelievable crowd! my sound system sucked but the competition was good! Vice Presidents of Awesome (season #7 championship winners-new name) ended up tied with 2 thumbs and kick ass with the Vice Prez taking it in overtime! Tanner's Shannigans came out as did The Wooly Mammoths! Griswolds were in the house along with McLovin and the NASB Hotties came all the way from Gladstone! 2 teams made the Trek from Independence! Next week we will have a way better sound system!! so be prepared for a night filled with montages!

Tonight's Shows.....Applebee's in Ottawa, Johnny's in Olathe, Birdies in Lenexa

and to wrap up today....Go Missouri!!! The Tigers battle Oklahoma State today and did you see the over and under 80! that is crazy! Tigers will cover the 14 point spread tonight! and will be wranked #1 in the country after Oklahoma loses to Texas today!

Rapunzlle, Rapunzlle Let down your receipt from the store!

What in the world is up with today's receipts??

To the people who print receipt tape with ads on the back: Cut it out. When I'm on the phone and I need to quickly find a piece of scrap paper to write down an important phone number, I don't want to see an ad for carpet cleaning. It's universally understood that the back of a receipt should be left blank so that it can be used as scratch paper. It is getting crazy, they are like 10 times longer than they need to be with tons of useless information. there is the part with the personalized message from the employee thanking you an advertisement for how you can phone in your prescription, then there is the ad for the online survey you can take where you could win $1 trillion dollars for filling it out. Then because English is our official language and we have to cater to everyone the whole thing is in Spanish again! and then the date and time is printed like 5 times all over the receipt! and at the very bottom there is a $2 coupon off your next $250 purchase at Walgreens....because everyone spends tons of money when they go to Walgreens, no one goes there to buy like 2 things!!!!!

Week #2 has been fantastic! tonight there is some great competition. In Topeka at Bullfrogs Live...League of Superheroes holds a 30 point lead over the Slackers. More Cowbell looks to build on their 300 point lead at Jerry's Bait Shop in Lenexa. The Underachievers and The Gary are just 15 points our of 1st place at Johnny's in Shawnee.

Wow it tells you when it's Cold!!

Isn't that awesome how Coors has come out with a "cold-activated" bottle. The label’s white lettering and Rocky Mountain icon turn blue when the beer reaches optimal drinking temperature. Thank God for that, huh? Otherwise, how in hell am I supposed to know when my beer is ok to drink? I put a Coors in the freezer and took it out after 3 hours, but the label still said "Coors" so I threw it out!

I went to KFC yesterday have you ever looked at their packets of "honey"? You'll notice that it's actually labeled "honey sauce." Honey is the third ingredient, which means that is at most one third honey. Makes you wonder what the first two ingredients in the "chicken" are.

Week #2 is in full swing, tonight there are four great shows, Old Chicago in Olathe hosted by DJ Nick, Paddy O'Quigley's in Leawood hosted by DJ Charlie Agrusa, Side Pockets in NKC hosted by DJ DC and Tanner's in Waldo hosted by DJ Josie!

so I am in the shower thinking about monkeys!

let's start with "Get your mind out of the gutter"

The other day I noticed that my shampoo bottle claims that its contents were "not tested on animals."This should make me feel good, I suppose, but as usual I thought too hard about what that statement meant exactly, and ended up irritated, confused and wrinkly.I think the controversy about animal testing arises from a misunderstanding of the word 'testing.' To me, 'testing' something means using something in the manner it was intended to be used, to see if you get the desired result. So to test shampoo on a monkey, you would first shampoo the monkey's hair, then rinse the monkey, and finally smell the monkey to see if the monkey still smells like a monkey. If, rather than smelling like a combination of monkey sweat and poo, the monkey now smells like a combination of strawberries and wildflowers, then success! Otherwise, it's back to the lab again.

So while you may hear horror stories about how scientists smear shampoo directly into the monkey's eyes to see how they'll react, I think that such cases are probably rare, and result mainly from inadequate training of the scientists. I think the scientists just need to be told what shampoo is actually for, and that they can assume that having shampoo smeared into your eyes (or your monkey's eyes) is going to hurt like hell, so they don't really need to test for that.

I say that if manufacturers aren't going to bother to go through the due diligence of animal testing, they should be required to pay the first couple hundred humans who try their product. Besides helping to ensure that our shampoos are properly tested before being sold in stores, this system would also open up employment opportunities to individuals who might otherwise not be able to find jobs. I'm speaking, of course, of the chronically dirty.Just imagine what would happen if a shampoo manufacturer sent a bus through the seedy parts of town offering free shampooing to all of the homeless people, in exchange for a warm meal, a bed for the night, and signing a release form waiving them of any liability. Best case scenario, you'd have a lot of clean, well-rested homeless people who smell like strawberries and wildflowers. And even if things go horribly wrong and they all die of cancer, at least you'd have fewer homeless people

alrighty then Week #1 is off to a great start! Chicken Little came over to Tanner's on 87th and Knocked off the top teams there, I Kiss Girls knocked off Car Ramrod last night at Tanner's 119th and the Xtreme Team Trivia locations are all looking very competive! Remember it is only a nine week competition this time!